PORNOGRAPHY AND YOUR SEX LIFE
– Oba Samuel
“For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: that every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God”
1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 KJV
In this present time, many people explore numerous ways to derive sexual satisfaction or sexual adventures and one of the commonest ways is pornography. My daily experience with couples over the years has made me realised that, it is not only youths/singles that indulge in it, many married couples engage in it too.
Read This:
What To Do If Your Spouse Is Addicted To Porn
LIES YOU MUST NOT BELIEVE ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY
1.It’s the best way to explore sex
2.You will enjoy better sex
3.It will increase your sexual frequency
4.It will make your spouse enjoy sex with you
5.You will have deeper understanding of sex and sex organs
6.Your spouse will be happier in marriage
7.More fun, excitement, pleasure and orgasms
I want you to get this fact today that pornography is not helpful to your sex life as many claimed.
So, let’s look at devastating effects of porn in marriage :
NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF PORNOGRAPHY
1.Detrimental to children :Pornography is like a cat with nine lives as it keep moving from generation to generation
The reason is that most people caught in its web confessed to get exposed to it first through their father’s secret porn film,magazine or phones. Another source is through a friend’ house.
You can’t be too smart to keep it away from your children forever. Your addiction to it can easily expose your children to it and this may lead to incest among them or launch them into sexual molestation and abuse .
2,Those who use pornography are devoid of joy and often end in depression because porn often presents unrealistic world of sex. It is inhuman to base your sex life on it.
3.Research has shown that couples who use pornography does not enjoy sexual satisfaction compares to couples who don’t .
4.Addiction to porn reduces sexual frequency between couples who engage in it.
5.Wives of husband who watch pornography films battles with feelings of frustration and loss of value. They feel used like prostitutes.
6.Resistance to replicating the styles and activities watched in porn films by the spouse of Porn addict often make the addict withdraw from spouse and go deeper into porn and desperate search for ‘better lover’ out of wedlock. It leads to violence and forceful sex
Attempts to force their spouse to replicate the sexual activities seen in the porn often cause grudge sex and disconnection among couples.
7.Watching porn materials will make it difficult for such husband to be satisfied and be “turn on” by his wife who may not be having stunning look like the lady he sees in porn .
8.Addiction to porn often leads to life of seclusion as the addicted spouse prefer to stay alone till midnight on the laptop/phone watching porn films and masturbate
9.The addicted spouse will get to the point of only getting sexual arousal through wild and obscene pictures to be “turn on”
10.Porn don’t satisfy, it leads to cravings which often lead to wild search for more and masturbation .
11.Porn make people less productive as their brain is configured to sexualized fantasy all day long.
12.It’s a root cause of personal sexual gratification without considering the spouse’s satisfaction .
13.When husband /wife get engrossed in porn, its brings dissatisfaction of their spouse’s appearance ,affection and sexual performance.
Such becomes difficult to please sexually no matter how you try. Instead of being attracted to spouse, you are attracted to porn materials.
14.Porn program the brain to focus on naked pictures, sex scenes, and body parts, increased interest in risky, degrading, abusive, and/or illegal sex
15.It destroys relationship with the Holy Spirit ,prayer and Bible study life-Dead spiritual life
16.It destroy creativity and productivity. watching porn makes you less logical and less able to take vital decisions.
17.It leads to psychosocial problems such as depression, anxiety, anger, lying, stress and reduced social functioning.
18.It causes sleeplessness and inability to concentrate at work or ministry.
19.It leads to craving porn intensely and
difficulty controlling thoughts, or exposure to and use of porn
20.Relatioship with spouse is affected as partner views porn as infidelity i.e. “cheating”
21.Open doors to demonic attacks.
Please,read the concluding part in my next post-What to do if your spouse is addicted to porn.
Your Family & Relationship Coach,
Pst Oba Samuel
